ARE YOU DATING A NARCISSIST? Here is Why
Hello beautiful lady, you must have heard people say that love is blind. Well!!! Actually, it is not. Love is not blind. In fact, it is a decision based on knowledge which is ideally made after you have considered what is acceptable to you or not from your lover or intending spouse. And what’s that about a woman’s love again? Oh yes! It’s the type of love that is boundless and selfless; the kind you should never toss around to just anybody. This is why you need to know if you are stuck with a narcissist. So who is a narcissist anyway?
A straightaway definition would be lovely but no! Let us see the characteristics instead so that we can get a full grasp of who a narcissist is.
- The superior guy.
So your man feels like he was born superior to everyone around him and bad news sister…you are not left out. He’ll show it to you too that he is better than you in everything that you can think of. You’ll see it in how he tries to silence your opinions during an argument or how he’d not relent in using every opportunity to show how he can do or has done something better than you. He will make every conversation about him in his favor of course! Sometimes, his statements to you or about others may be downright demeaning or insulting and that is a no-no.
- Attention funnels.
Do you think your man ‘demands’ too much attention or constant admiration especially from you? Do you feel drained because he is never satisfied with the little ways you express your love for and to him? Do you think he doesn’t reciprocate the attention he gets from you? Have you been making excuses for him? He’s busy at work. He has a lot on his mind.
Take the icing off and see this cake as it is really is. If your man is only taking love and never giving any in return, you should see it as it is- a red light.
- Control freaks.
Is he always trying to control you? Does he try to determine what, when and how you do things? Is he always in your space such that your entire world is seemingly beginning to revolve around him? If you were thinking this is somewhat cute, you need to rethink because it is not healthy at all. There is absolutely nothing graceful about giving away your power to make choices. It’s your life and you should be able to live it on your terms and to your benefit.
- Never wrong.
I’m baffled when I hear a man say that they can never apologize to their woman even if they were wrong. Can you beat that? Now, they are a lot of good men in this world; men who know that nobody is perfect, that normal human beings make mistakes and who take responsibilities for their shortcomings. If your man thinks that it is impossible for him to make mistakes, please run as fast and far as you can. You are too beautiful for heartbreaks or to be taken for granted.
These are four basic characters of narcissists. Sometimes, they may show all or most of them. The key thing to do is to pay attention to their words and to how you feel around them. If you feel inadequate around them (make sure you don’t mistake poor self-esteem for when someone demeans you) or if they do not listen to you, take your challenges or fears for granted or fail to keep their promises, you may be in love with a narcissist who would never love you right because…oh well! They don’t know how to love people other than themselves.
P.S: there is a very high chance that you will want to measure every man in your life or the ones you will meet in the future by these four markers above. While you do this, we encourage you to be as objective as possible. Ensure that you observe carefully and do not jump into conclusions.
One more thing: never forget that nobody on this earth can be as awesome as you are and if the man in your life is making you doubt your worth just to massage his ego, he is narcissist and it’s time to kick him goodbye.