September 26, 2023

Breakups are hard!!! If you’ve ever been told otherwise, then know it now that you have been lied to. Like! Ordinary changes are usually quite challenging to adapt to; talk more of a breakup you probably never imagined when you had your first kiss with the seeming love of your life. It’s really every shade of negativity when you are going through heartbreak.

But I constantly have a tide of different sore feelings coursing through my being.

Of course! It is totally normally for you to experience even the most unimaginable emotion. You must remember however, that you can’t afford to stay heartbroken for too long because life has so much and more for you. And hey! You are so special and aren’t done happening to life. So, it’s time to fight and get your life back.


You’ll get your life back in time if you’d observe some, most, all or even more than the tips below. P.S: this is not a feel-better in three days scheme. Healing is a process and there is usually no time limit to it.

  1.  Block the communication channels.

You really do want to move on and quit sulking away in bed. And while it is not easy to achieve immediately, keeping the communication lines open can ultimately make it difficult for you to detach. The goal is not to forget him; it is not even advisable to try to do this because it will keep your mind spiraling around your ex.

Delete his number; block him on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other social media outlet on which you’re friends. Pictures and posts from your ex will only send you down the hole.

  • Do not stay friends, at least not immediately.

Your ex may suggest that you both should not stop talking totally. Please, politely decline by asking for time to think about it. You should never even suggest the “stay friends”. You need space and time to heal.

Often times, during or after a breakup, there is this one person who just wants to remain friends and there is this other person who wants more. This can be absolutely unhealthy if you are the latter. Space away from your ex will give you the power to find yourself back at your own pace.

  • Now, stop blaming yourself.

It is very easy to think of all the possible ways we contributed to bringing the relationship to a crash. This is counterproductive as the blaming changes nothing and adds nothing beneficial. Instead of counting how many flowers on a leave that says you both weren’t meant to be as against the ones that shows you were made for each other, take time to assess the relationship. Ask questions about the signs you missed, the things you and him did wrong. Yes! The relationship was about the two of you and it takes two to tango. If something goes wrong, then it is never just one person responsible. One thing: never ill-talk your ex too much. Endeavor to make all the actions you put towards handling the heartbeat, productive.

These three tips are basic and very essential to your healing process. If you can observe them, then you can be certain that you have begun the process to get yourself back, the right way.

Other things to try out include:

  • Begin an intense work-out routine. This will help you channel out all the rage within you.
  • Do not hold back the tear. Cry when you really want to. Don’t hold back.
  • Spend a lot of time outside. Fresh air is really helpful in clearing your thoughts. Evening walks will do.
  • It is okay to rely on your friends. The support you can get from your good friends is priceless.
  • Do not try to make plans to get back. Remember! You need time and space to heal.
  • Listen to good music, even if they talk about heartbreaks. You’ll be surprised at the wonders they will work over time.
  • Never ever posts details of your heartbreak. You’ll see how stupid it is after you’ve healed.
  • Have swims or warm baths. It works wonders.

Finally, do not try to rush the healing process. It is okay to check your progress level of how you have been carrying on fine without him. Do not rush the process however.

Always remember that you are special and that your life is very beautiful…get it back!

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